Failure Leading to Success.

flail, fail, prevail, all hail.
people like to think that this is the sequence that always will occur. Not really. Most likely that the first two will happen and thats it. I mean, if you look hard enough, dig deep enough, you could probably find some good in every time that you mess up. Something that you can learn from for the next time. But i hate it when people try to glorify failure as just part of a great process. it sucks. period. But anyway, thats not what i wanted to write about today.

Taking success from failure was the message at the bible study last night. It was a good time. Seeing people from a different school, a rival school nonetheless, all loving God together was a blessing. But the story doesnt really start till after we got back from the bible study. The game of fuseball that ensued after our return was heated. It was going back and forth, every goal cause for loud yelling. It was 8-8 and they scored. I went to go around the table to my left to give my friend on the opposing side a fake high-five. And i ccught my leg, or so i thought, on the table as i moved forward. I looked down and saw my friends dog attached to my right thigh.
WOW.
I have never been bitten seriously by a dog before. It didnt really hurt. We were all just shocked. I knew that the dog was partial to her master, but didnt know how protective she was, until then. I didnt get mad at the dog...it was instinct. She was protecting her master from my swift advance. And i like dogs. She was adopted by my friend, so who knows what she went through in the past. I am glad that he locked her into her kennel after she bit me though, because i would hate for the same situation to occur again, but with a different person who wouldnt be so forgiving. Folks, this was a legit bite....two fang gashes, about an inch apart on my upper right thigh. Pretty sore the next day, but no gangrene yet so thats a plus.
Anyway that was one of the more exciting events of my current life, so i thought i would throw it up here...
i will hopefully be putting out some more real talk soon, but until then.
peace

Losing a Coach

Today i lost a coach.
It wasnt even up for a vote.
It just happened.
Out of the blue.
39 YEARS of AGGIE FOOTBALL.
I got 1.5 out of the 39 and i still cried.

I have had many coaches in my life.
Some i was happy to see go.
Others, it was just a shame.
This was a shock.
This was a blow.
This coach is IRREPLACEABLE.
And he wasn't even "my"coach, but then again he was MY coach.

Of course there are reasons.
Understandable, logical reasons.
There is always a reason.
But something about the emotion of football, and the coach-player relationship, dims the logic of it.

I wish my coach the best.
He is a great man.
Some people tell you they are "great" by the way they act and carry themselves.
This man told me he was great through the mouths and testimonies of others, those who's lives he touched.
A multitude.

Some say crying is outside the "manbox".
i disagree.
When you see someone pour out their heart to a football team.
Everyday, for almost half a century.
And now the path of life must take them elsewhere, and you see the pain that this causes them.
Something ought to rise up inside of you.
It did in me.

When you leave someone, something that you LOVE.
Tears are shed.
And there is no "manbox".

The vacancy will never be filled.
There will always be a cavity, a hole where he belongs.
Nobody can replace that humor, that goofiness.
Nobody can replace the ideals, the integrity.
Nobody can replace the work ethic, the one liners.
Nobody can replace the kindness, the Heart.
Nobody can replace our coach, my coach.
Nobody.

Time is the enemy.
Time is always on the move.
But time will not take from me what you have given to me, coach.
The memories, the lessons, the advice, the handshake, the pat on the back, the final hug.
Those are enshrined.

So coach.
I am disappointed that the remaining years of my football career will be spent without you on the field with me.
But know that the remaining years of my football career will be spent with the lessons you taught, and the example you were.
Of AGGIE PRIDE
Exemplified to the fullest extent.

I will see you around.
And i will always appreciate and respect you coach.
You will always be.
MY COACH.

Habakkuk JOY

3 vs 17-19
"though the fig tree does not bud and there are no grapes on the vines, though the olive crop fails and the fields produce no food, though there are no sheep in the pen and no cattle in the stalls, YET i will rejoice in the Lord, I will be joyful in God my savior. The Sovereign Lord is my strength; he makes my feet like the feet of a deer, he enables me to go on the heights."

Habakkuk means "to embrace".


when all around is rain and clouds and darkness,

when all the people around you are fake and fail you in every way,

when all you see around the world is suffering and hate and greed,

remember.

that there is a power unexplanable

that will make you able

to merely cope? NO

to merely survive? NO

to thrive? YES

to rejoice? YES

and this joy will enable you to "embrace" things as they are and be strong.

a joy that will prompt you to sing a song.

a joy that will be visible in the vibe you give.

a joy that will shine through the life you live.

a supernatural joy.

so in these times of promised change,

know that the word of man is as changing as a the score of a basketball game.

and find your joy in the Lord,

knowing that you will not be let down.

EVER

C.O.R.I.N.N,

Celestial
Outstanding
Radiant
Intelligent
Nice
Neat

Hello everyone,

My life has been changed forever. On January 1, the first day of this glorious year, I saw her... She was breathtakingly beautiful and her smile was like the sunshine. I was a little too nervous to talk to her but luckily she came up to me. Then I finally got up the courage and called her and boy am I glad I did. I can't believe she went out with me. It was great. I even got a new guy friend from hanging out with her. I want to talk to her every night. I am done searching I have found the one and I hope I don't do anything to mess that up. I am going to get an earring. Sometimes I cry at night wishing she was here. I just wanted you to know how I felt about this whole post being a work of fiction. The fantasy of a certain corinn on how my affection toward her should be. She is very creative in her mind, and how she comes up with this i do not know. But there is some truth here, i must be honest; January 1 is the first day of the year. This i cannot deny. Also corinn did come on the prowl for me, actually quite aggresively now that i think of it...but what can i say? i claim to know what women want, but when they want me, sometimes things happen a little bit unpredictably.
So again, there is some truth in this fantasaical post, but unfortunately the fiction far outweighs the facts.

spoke

the spoken word:

the expression of some thing observed?
reviving some things once heard?
occuring in a time where "to be heard" is absurd?
living on throughout generations? (if it holds merit to do so)
immortal but not invisible or God only wise...
visibility being its vessel and God being the inspiration for some...

and now to the Punch:

for the word NOT SPOKEn,
is like the bike wheel with the SPOKEs removed; easily contorted, weak, doomed to ultimate collapse.
the word on the page that has not been given the life of man,
is like potential energy; the rock balanced at the tip of the cliff.
useless until it is converted through the vocal chords, the tongue, the lips, of man.
the mind can create words, phrases, expressions of thought, but
the gap between writing and speaking is large.
written ------ and ------ spoken.
expressed ------ and ------ claimed.
anonymous ------ and------ fully responsible.

Make the leap
Clear the gap
Vault the gorge
But know this:
Once once you have made, cleared, vaulted,
there is NO going back.
Embrace it.
peace
-D weazy

My Travels

Wat up world...
im here in Middletown, Delaware with family.
Let me rewind for you to the beginning, although so much has happened over the past four days...
the four and a half hour flight...
the cramped ass...
arriving into jfk at 6:30 AM...
the rental car drama that lasted for 2 hours...
arriving at the hotel at 2 PM...
haircut in Harlem...
the Famous Fish Market...
dinner at Londell's...
Finally sleep at the hotel.

[day two]

Breakfast at Golden's in Teaneck...
off to Staten island to see more family...
still in Staten island...
still in Staten island...
ok, back to the Hotel...
holla at the Jets running back in the lobby...(they lost)
sleep...

[day three]

Church in Englewood, NJ...
lunch with more family in Teaneck...
good laughs...
good times...
packing up at the hotel...
dinner at Floridita with titi carmen...
master packing job in the Lincoln...
the drive to Delaware...
more family...
asleep late in Middletown...

[day four]
awaking late, to the sunny in december?...
morning run with the ipod...
vultures chillin on the roof, waiting...
the near death doberman experience...
the sprint home...
GREAT breakfast...
pop's grits...
movin the marble mammoth...
into Philly to see more family...
cheesesteak and hoagies...
South Street and Lorenzo and Sons...
back to Middletown...
chillin with them CUz's...
And here i am.

TBC... when i return to D town...
-peace
dweazy

WAT up to all you people that may happen upon my blog in the next week or so!!
Im headin out of town on Christmas for awhile.
i will try to keep up on the blog, but i dont know exactly what my internet acess will be and how much time i will have (busy season) ya dig?
anyway, MERRY CHRISTMAS to all!
happy new year!
GOD BLESS!
-dweazy